Hayden's birth story

4th November 2009

It was the week before my due date, my first son Dylan had been born on his expected day and knowing this was unlikely to happen again I had no real idea if I would be early or late. Despite the thought process of ‘it could be anytime now’ I knew it could also be a few more weeks and this was a time to be cherished and despite the huge belly, enjoyed.

Remembering the advice from my NCT teacher first time around to ‘get the oxytocin going’ I had spent the day before indulging myself with a spa gift from the girls at work, followed by a relaxing yoga class. During the class I was getting all sorts of twinges that continued through till I went to bed.

Dylan woke me up at 6am and despite the early start and mild back pains I felt full of energy. I took him downstairs and we snuggled up with a DVD. At around 8am and I got up to get a cuppa and suddenly it felt as if I had lost control of my bladder and I realised my waters had broken. This hadn’t happened until right at the end of my first birth so I was unsure about how imminent the birth would be. After contacting the midwife I was informed that it could be some time and if it was too long I would need to go into hospital for observation. I wasn’t having any strong contractions and so they advised me to work with gravity and to keep moving. I was hoping for a homebirth so started to feel a little unsure of what was ahead. It was conveniently the day that Dylan goes to nursery so he left with my husband, Jack, for work. I finished the ironing and started getting things a little organised in the house followed by shower and a second breakfast. Jack called and said he would be back at 11am and I told him not to hurry. I was feeling pretty relaxed and had been calling friends and family. As soon as Jack got back around 12pm the back pains were building and becoming more regular. I was keen for them to get going knowing it would bring me that much closer to meeting my baby. After about an hour I had a wave of tiredness and felt like relaxing in the bath. We put some music on and I continued to sing my way through the first really strong contractions whilst Jack timed them and read to me. They became increasingly intense and I suddenly felt a little bit like pushing. This sent me into a bit of a panic and I began to feel a little shaky as it seemed too soon so we let the midwife know things were progressing. By that time I was having some pretty impressive pain and had to be helped out of the bath. Each time I went to stand up my legs wobbled and I was back on all fours having a contraction. The midwife arrived 10 minutes later at around 2.30pm she checked me and I was only 3-4 cm dilated. I was surprised and dazed as the contractions felt so close together and unlike with my first I felt unable to stand and sway away the pain. We went downstairs and I tried to focus my mind on some of the things I’d practiced in yoga such as climbing a mountain and then down again with each contraction and then I switched to the image of a lotus flower opening. This really helped me during the moments of calm between contractions and I even managed to eat a flapjack and have a drink. Yet during the contraction I found it hard to gather my breath and would have to go down on my knees. So as things began to feel overwhelming I resorted to focusing on the tapping of my feet on the floor. I then asked to be helped to the toilet. As I sat down gravity worked its magic and I felt the urge to push. I was helped quickly off and carried into the lounge then back I went down on my knees with my head and torso resting on an arm chair. I could tell things were getting exciting by the tone of Jack’s voice, he kept saying ‘I can see the head...it’s amazing.. .well done…keep going’. The second midwife arrived at around 15:15, and then, only 15 minutes later at 15.27 Hayden was born.

It had all been pretty quick and I was amazed to be sitting there with my new baby staring at my amazing umbilical cord. The third stage also went pretty quickly and within a short period I was lounging back in a big comfy chair with a cup of tea whilst Hayden had his checks and daddy cuddles. After I had fed him I had a bath and they tucked me up in bed then Jack went off to pick Dylan up from nursery. My neighbour Vicky waited with me and said the house felt so calm and peaceful and was thrilled about the fact she was able to meet a 2hr old baby.
It was a truly beautiful experience and I never imagined I could do it without pain relief and actually really enjoy being totally in the moment. Dylan was very excited to meet his brother and has been coping incredibly well so far. He is very protective of Hayden and I am so proud of both my boys.